13 months... how is my baby over the age of ONE.

Three days ago while we were at BC Children's hospital having Hazel's follow up with her cardiologist, the technician doing her ECHO confirmed that she was 13 months old. I was about to correct her that Hazel was 12 months when I realized she was right. 13 months made me tear up. One, well one was exciting! We had a party, and we celebrated because one year prior she was fighting life and death. But 13 months made me suddenly very aware that my baby was growing up.

I have a freaking toddler. My only saving grace is that her corrected age is 9 months so I'm easing myself into "toddlerhood" by telling myself that "technically" or "theoretically" (I'm really not sure) she's still my 9 month old baby girl. 

But then, she gives me kisses. Legit, for the first time yesterday leaned in over and over again and kissed her mama. toddler.

She shovels raspberries into her mouth during breakfast like nobody's business. toddler.

When she's being silly, she tries not to smile but looks you right in the eyes with such attitude and the corners of her lips curl up, her pout puckers and her cheeks puff out... she can't hide her smile (but I'll never tell her that). toddler.

You take something away before she's through with it and one epic meltdown ensues.. toddler.

It's a funny thing, time. You wish for moments to happen and then they do and they're past and you wonder where the time went. With Christmas quickly approaching I'm finding myself to be an emotional mess this year. This Christmas is a stark contrast to last Christmas when my dad was in cardiac ICU recovering from open heart surgery over Christmas across the hall from the neonatal ICU where Hazel was. This year, we are surrounded by loved ones, our baby is home and we have been so fortunate to watch the magic of Christmas through her eyes... but it means she's 13 months.. in fact, come new years she'll only be a week away from 14 months. Let's not go there though.

**Images by Rebecca Lynn Photography**